Here With Yondaime
by DracoAries
Summary: We have all read ask NARUTO characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.
1. Chapter 1

**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **8th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter I:**

_Yondaime puts the camera on and gets behind his desk and sits down._

"Right, that should do it..."

_He looks friendly into the camera._

"Hi, everyone and welcome to '_Here With Yondaime_'! I'm Yondaime. Yeah, the Fourth Hokage himself. I'm here to answer all your questions. As long as they have something to do with me. Haha! I'm kidding. As long as they have something to do with _NARUTO_ I'll answer."

_He picks up a paper._

"Aah, questions already. Well, nothing strange; they're from the authour's friend, _Scarlet Butterfly_.

1: Will you date me?

2: Will you be my boyfriend?

3: Will you marry me?"

_He sits still for a moment._

"Oh... kaaay... well, I... um, I feel... thanks, that's nice... well, for the first question. Only if we go to Ichiraku Ramen Bar. And if you pay. Hehe! Yeah... for the second; no, because I don't know you at all. I mean, dude! For the third one. How stupid do you think I am? I said I don't know you. Bitch... Okay, okay, that was mean, I'm sure you're nice. So, Ichiraku then. Friday? That's okay? Right, I'll pick you up at 8. Happy?"

_He sits there for a couple of seconds without doing anything._

"Well... this is awkward..."

_He starts singing '_The Internet is for Porn_' by _Avenue Q

"Gaw, this is totally boring. Hey, Sarutobi!"

_The other Hokage comes in._

"Could you get me a glass of water?"

_Sarutobi says he's too busy, because he's the only Hokage doing something._

"Hmph! Bastard! Well... this is like so boring."

_Yondaime sighs._

"Look, guys. If you want me to do something, send me some questions. I mean, that's why I'm here, right? What's that, Sarutobi? I'm here to be a Hokage? Well, yeah, but you're the one doing the work, sucker."

_He flips it._

"Hehe! Bastard... so, send me questions. Just click where it says 'submit review' and ask me anything. About _NARUTO_. Yeah... right..."

_He goes back to the camera._

"How the hell do you turn this thing off? Aaah..."

_He tries to turn it off, but..._

"AAARGH! DAMN MOTHER FU-"

_He threw it out of the window._


	2. Chapter 2

**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **9th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 2:**

_Yondaime sets up his new camera._

"There, all set up!"

_He sits down behind his desk again._

"Hello, and welcome back to '_Here With Yondaime_'. I am Yondaime and I'm freaking hot. Duuude... Right! Okay, at first I have to say something about me being alive or not and stuff like that."

_He clears his throath._

"I am alive. Duh! And I belive that's what confused some reviewrs a little bit. Naruto is a year old now. So, yeah. That should do it... And I will sit here and answer questions pretty much every day around 3. So check then. If you ask me questions after 3, I won't answer before the next day."

_He picks up a paper._

"Okay, so my first question is from _isrock_:

'How do you feel about team?'

Well, teams are great. Yeah, 'cause they're like... funny. It's a great idea to get friends and to know people. So, yeah. And I invented teams... no, not really... Oh, but I don't like my team. They're so... annoying. I mean, come on! Kakashi's all like I'm-the-greatest-ever-and-I-don-t-need-anybody. And Obito's like the oposite. And Rin, she's... weird... Okay, I actually like them. 'Cause they have to do as I say... yeah..."

_He picks up another paper._

"Wow, many questions here... from _yondaime-kun_:

'Did you know that Kakashi is a perv?'

Yes, I did know that. And I still do. He won't admit though, of course. But I found his porn, so, HAH! IN YOUR FACE, KAKASHI! What did you say, Sarutobi? No, I did not snook in his home to see if he had plans on killing Obito. Okay, I did. Hehe...

'Would you ever date Sakura?'

Who the hell is that? Oh, it's that little girl with pink hair. Right... ARE YOU CRAZY? I mean, she's only a year. If she was older... no, I have a bad feeling about her. I think she's gonna be annoying. I know I didn't have to answer, but I did.

'What would you do if you found out the villagers were hurting Naruto?'

I would pull down their pants, shove my foot up there twice, then a kunai, then my foot again. Then I would tie them up and throw them out of a bridge. After they'd be almost dead, I'd get them up and sing '_Mary had a Little Lamb_' over and over with a really crappy voice. Then I would shove my foot up their ass again. After I would have done all that, I would carry them to the hospital and yell, 'OH NO, THEYE'RE HURT! WHAT KIND OF MANIAC WOULD SHOVE THEIR FOOT UP SOMEONE'S ASS?', and that would be it. By the way, who's Naruto? Haha, I'm only kidding.

Ø'Wouldn't it be awsome if you could travel to the future to see what Konoha looks like?'

Sure, but I live here, so I already know. But it would be fun, really.

'Do you ever plan on hook up Rin and Obito?'

Yes, yes, I do. Kakashi and I are working on it. We believe they're together after three more question-answerings. Cool, huh?

'Cool, name, isn't it?'

Yes, it's like, so cool. Named after me... but then again, who wouldn't? Kiddiiing... Well, that's all from my Mini-Me. Thanks!"

_He stands up and stretches._

"Man, you get stif from answering questions..."

_He sits down again and picks up a new paper._

"Right, so here we go with the questions from _Chikara-san_:

'What was Kakashi like as a little kid?'

Well, he himself says he stopped being a kid when he was four... so... um... Sarutobi?"

_The other Hokage comes inside._

"Was Kakashi still a kid when he was five or what? He was? Oh, he's still a kid. What, still? But he's jounin... okay, okay, he's a kid."

_Sarutobi leaves._

"Well, Kakashi was, and still is, a little brat. 'Cause he's an ass... He thinks he can do everthing by himself and... yeah... But I like him. He's cool. 'Cause he gives me porn. Fine, I steal it from him. When he's sleeping. But don't tell him... shhh...

'What do you think about the Third taking over your job?'

Actually, Sarutobi was made Hokage before me, so it would rather be the other way around. Well, he does do the work I have to do... so I'm totally okay with it. Because I don't have to do anything. Hehe! Boring? Oh yeah, he's boring all right. DID YOU HEAR THAT, SARUTOBI?"

_Sarutobi tells him to shut the hell up._

" Yeah... but you know, you should be thankful that he's doing my work. Or else I wouldn't have time to answer questions.

'Do you think Naruto would make a good Hokage?'

Sure, but he's only a year old. I belive everybody has a chance of becomeing Hokage. Except Obito. 'Cause he sucks... okay, because he's an idiot."

_He picks up the last paper._

"Geez, many questions. People sure love. But I can't blame you; I'm hot! From _Emperor Jaden_:

'ØWhy not just make a seal that doesn't kill you to defeat Kyuubi?'

Um... I'm... gonna die like that? By a FREAKING SEAL? Damn! When is this gonna happen? Well, thanks for the warning. At least I can try to make up a seal like that now. Killed by a seal...

'ØI'm pretty sure Naruto is your kid, and, if so, who was his Mom?'

Naruto's my kid? Oooh... shit. Well, if he is... I have no idea who his mother is. Hehe... hehe... he... Right, um... question, yeah...

'ØIf Itachi Uchiaa is alive, right now, go kill him.'

That... wasn't a question. More of a demand. So I'm not gonna do it. Sorry...

'ØYour the most powerful person on the planet, why not track down Orochimaru, then kill him?'

Most powerful? Well, not to brag, but DAMN RIGHT! I am! I'm so great. Kill Orochimaru... whyyyy? I could track him down, but kill him? Well, you do tell me I should trust you on this one. I do! I would love to kill him now. But I don't have time, because I have to answer all you guys' questions.

'WØhy the God of Death?'

Because therefor. It sounds good. God of fire? Yeah, that could work, but he's not made of fire, he's made of... um... death? Yeah, he's made of death. Kyuubi's still sealed... what the fuck is that? What kyuubi? Oh, that seal-thing is the one I'm gonna die from, right? You watch out... kyuubi-thing! I won't die! 'Cause I don't want to."

_He gets up and walks towards the camera._

"That's all the questions. Hope you got the answers you wanted."

_He turns off the camera._


	3. Chapter 3

**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **10th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage, Sarutobi & Obito Uchiha (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 3:**

_Yondaime puts on the camera again._

"So here we are again, '_Here With Yondaime_'. I'm the hot hottie Yondaime and I've got so many questions today."

_He picks up the first paper._

"From _Emperor Jaden _again. That's nice, posting again.

'WhatØ would you do if nine men riding on giant demons came to attack Konoha?'

Um... well, I'd... uh... I'd... kill them? I mean, it's my village. And I'm Hokage, so... yeah, kill them. Why are you asking this? Are there nine men riding on giant demons who are coming to attack Konoha? NO! I'M NOT READY FOR THAT YET! I mean, come on! I have so many questions to answer. Hey, Sarutobi can fight them. Yeah, he can. Nice...

'Are you obsessed with ramen?'

Why, yes, I AM! It's so graet. You're tossing ramen everywhere? Oooh, me want!"

_He eats the ramen the nice reviewer tossed to him._

"Geez, thanks!

'WØhat would you do if some older brother killed his entire clan, and told the only person he didn't kill, his little brother, that to get revenge, he must hate everything?'

Uh... I... don't... know. Has that ever happened? I guess not! Will it happen? Oh yeah, you're that reviewer who tells the future! Well, since I know that's gonna happen... I will... um, let's see... I would pull down the older brother's pants, shove my foot up his ass twice, then a kunai, and then my foot again. Then I would tie him up and toss him off a bridge. After that I would drag him up and sing '_Mary had a Little Lamb_' with a really crappy voice. But I wouldn't carry him to the hospital, just let him die. Happy? Good! Thanks for your questions again!"

_He picks up the next questions._

"Let's see... from _Redcrimsonblood_'s friend appearantly, _RabidFangirl_:

'What do you think of Jiraya or Tsunade being Godaime?'

AAARGH! NOT JIRAYA!!! OR TSUNADE!!! They're insane! Tsunade was babysitting Kakashi when he was younger. She lost him in a bet. THREE TIMES! And then Sakumo, Kakashi's dad, let Jiraya watch him. How do you think he became a pervert? Dude, not them.

'A you a closet pervert like Ebisu?'

How dare you compare me to that closet pervert? I have never... I mean, dude! I'm not a closet pervert like him. I'm just a pervert.

'OØrochimaru wanted me to tell you he's coming to rape you and when Naruto gets to age 12 he'll come to rape him too.'

What kind of question is that? And I doub't he will! 'Cause I'm like the greatest ever and I would kill him. He doesn't dare touching Naruto. 'Cause I say so!"

_He picks up a new paper._

"From _ScarletButterfly91_. Oh yeah, she's _Scarlet Butterfly_ in the first chapter, so she's the same.

'Do you like brownies?'

No, I LOVE brownies! They're so... chocolate-like and... brown... yeah... SARUTOBI!"

_The Third comes in._

"I need brownies!"

_Sarutobi doesn't care and walks away._

"Bastard! Well, I'll bye some later."

_He picks up another paper._

"Hey, from _yondaime-kun _again.

'Why did you call me Mini-Me?'

Well, have you seen '_Austin Powers_'? No? Well, Dr. Evil has a mini copy of himself. So, you know... sorry if it offended you...

'What would you do if Tsunade ever became Hokage?'

I would jump off a bridge. No, I'm just kidding! I would throw her off a bridge. No, I'm kidding again! I don't know what I would do. She's insane, you know...

'Did you know that Naruto gets paired up with an emo Uchiha boy?'

Paired up as... in a team? I sure hope so... Well, now I do. Hey, I have a question for all of you reviewers who tell me about the future: What kind of Jutsu do you use for that? I want it!

'Can I say hi to Obito?'

Well, it's highly unusual, but since you did call yourself after me... OBITO!"

_Obito Uchiha runs into the office._

"A girl says hi!"

_Obito waves to his fan._

"Yeah, get out now!"

_Yondaime shoves him out._

"Happy? Good!

'Maybe I should call myself after him?'

No, you shouldn't! 'Cause I say so!"

_He picks up yet another paper._

"Geez, I have too many fans... from _TWNJ_. Haha... cool name...

'Did you help Jiraya write his pervy books?'

No, I was modell for the illustrations. Because I have a really hot body, you know.

'What's your favourite colour?'

Wow, I like this question. Um, I think... eeeehhhh... yellow! I mean, I am called the _Yellow Flash_. I kick ass!

'How come you're so hot?'

Oh my... well, it's nature! I can't help it. But I'm not only hot; I'm very intelliga... intelligea... intell-"

_Sarutobi says it's intelligent._

"I KNEW THAT, STUPID!!! I'm intelligent too!

'WØhy would you use your own son as a container for the kyuubi?'

Oh, here's the freaking kyuubi-thing again. I don't know why! Maybe because I couldn't go to some random home and say, 'Hey, give me your son, I have to use him for a container for a kyuubi-thing I dodn't know what is yet and condamn him to probably die,' now, could I? Exactly! Thanks!"

_He picks up one of the two remaining papers._

"Aah, from _leafninja345435_. I hate numbers... confuseing...

'If you're not Naruto's father, then who is?'

Okay, so here's the truth; I am his father. I bet many fans are celebrating now, huh? Nice! Just remember to bring sake to your parties."

_He picks up the last paper._

"Almost done now... from _isrock_ again.

Ø'Does your son Naruto hang out with Susake and Sakura?'

Um, yeah, sometimes. But he and Sasuke try to kill each other of unknown strange reasons, so not so often. With Sakura? Yeah, sometimes.

'Does your team babysit?'

Yes, they do. Rin loves it, 'cause kids are like, cute. Obito only does if he knows Kakashi is; He wants to be better than him at something. And Kakashi does it because I say it's a mission. When I get home Kakashi and Obito usually try to kill each other. Rin does the work."

'PS: Kill Itachi.'

How come people demand me to kill someone? And why him? I don't bother, I'm too tired."

_He gets up and stretches._

"Well, that's all. Send me more questions or else I have to work. And working sucks! See you all tomorrow then, I hope!"

_He turns off the camera._


	4. Chapter 4

**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **11th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 4:**

_The camera is turned on by Yondaime and he sits down behind his desk._

"Welcome yet again to '_Here With Yondaime_'. You all know I'm Yondaime by now so... yeah! Let's go straight to it, it's a lot of questions now..."

_He picks up a paper._

"Ah, from _yondaime-kun _yet again. Oh, so you didn't change the name, that's reliefe.

'Did you know that Sakura can knock out people when she gets older?'

No, but then again, who can't? Come on, you just leap up behind them and hit them in their had with a really heavy object. Even I can do that. I mean, of course I can do that. Because I'm the greatest ever. So yeah!

'What would you do if Naruto decided to wear spandex?'

Wha...?"

_He gets chills down his spine._

"Please tell me doesn't! Gai's bad enough. We don't need another one wearing a spandex. Please tell me Naruto won't!? Or anybody else! I can't stand the thought of it. Dude!

'Would you ever let Jiraya and Kakashi teach ever Naruto?'

Wow... no, at least not Jiraya. Like I've said; He made Kakashi a freaking pervert. He was also the one who made Obito's eyes so... you know, the cry-thing. He put oil in them by an "accident". Accident my ass... So no, not Jiraya. Kakashi... well, no... He's weird. He's the comrade of my team quite often and, well... Obito once ended up in the hospital with a kunai up his ass. So I don't really trust him.

'What would you do if Naruto learned a perverted Jutsu, that he made up?'

I would ask him to teach me. 'Cause that would be so awsome!

'Why don't you invent it?'

Hey, good idea! I'll start on it a bit later. Cool...

'PS: Did you know that you are almost like Naruto in every single way?'

No, I didn't! I thought he was like me in every way!? I mean, I'm the parent, right? That's all from my Mini-Me, which I am allowed to call him/her."

_He picks up the next paper._

"From _TWNJ _again. Hey, I really digg that name, what does it stand for? Oh, right, questions...

'Which is your favourite band, _My Chemical Romance_, _The Konoha Kunai _or _Frank Sinatra_?'

Oh, that's _My Chemical Romance_. Love them! I really love '_Black Parade_'.

'What's the Kazekage like?'

Um... I'm not sure... they've gotten a new one and I haven't met him/her yet. Hope it's a woman! A sxy woman! But it's probably a dude... damn...

'If the villages have have manga or anime, what's your favourite?'

Ooh, I love questions like these. Yes, we do have that, I don't see why not? My favourite manga must be _Love Hina_. Not because of the naked girls! I'm not a pedophile! It's just... cute! Yeah, cute! And my Favourite anime must be _Fruits Basket _or perhaps _Gravitation_. That's it, let's get the next ones..."

_He picks up the next paper._

"From _Redcrimsonblood_ again. No it's from her friend, _RabidFangirl _again.

'What do you think of the Akatsuki?'

I hate them! Really! And not just because they're evil and all, but look at their clothes. What the hell is that? How can you fight in that? Dude! I would so kick their asses and beat them to the ground. That would be awsome! But I don't have time right now, I'll do it next week or something."

_He picks up the last paper._

"Aah, the last questions. From _kksmarties_. Hehe, funny name... like it...

'DØo you think Sasuke will be an emo in the near future?'

Well, Obito did say he cut his wrist last time they babysat him... so yeah, I think so! I just wonder where the heck he got that kunai!?

'Do you think Sakura is hot?'

Uh... she's... like a year old... no, I don't think so! But she's really cute! She's so small and adorable. Like Naruto! Only that Naruto's cuter. Because he looks like me! And I'm cute too! Still!

'Do you think Rin is hot?'

Um... no! She's, how old, 13? Yeah, she's 13. Dude, that's sick and wrong! Against all moral. Allthough I don't have much moral... It's still gross.

'Why do you curse so much?'

It's fun! They're only words, right? But hey, if you reviewers don't want me to because it offends you in any way, I'll stop. So just tell me, okay?

'How old are you?'

17! Or... not... Fine, I'm older, but damned hot! Okay, so I'm 26. Why, you wanna date me or something? Haha, just kidding! So that's all the questions. Then I have a speciall announsment to make; Next time I-"

_Sarutobi bursts in._

"What? More questions? You're kidding?"

_Sarutobi gives him four more papers._

"WHAT?"

_Sarutobi leaves, smirking._

"Well, there are more questions after all. You guys love me don't you? Yeah! Well, okay, the first ones are from _anime-girl98_.

'WØhy did Obito have to die on that mission in rock country?'

Well, that hasn't happen yet, so I'm sure you're just crazy. Or maybe it will happen? Well, it's probably a long time to till that happens, so... yeah!

'Is Naruto your son?'

I think I've already answered this, but I'm happy to do it again! Yes, he is!

'What Ødo you think of how much he looks like you?'

I'm so damned proud! It shows he's my son and all. That's so great, you know?

'Is ØTobi from Akatsuki actually Obito under that one-eyed mask?'

Ah... no... Obito's here with us. In Konoha. Right now he's outside my office trying to strangle Kakashi. I think he's loseing. OBITO! KAKASHI! GO SOMEWHERE ELSE IF YOU'RE GONNA KILL EACH OTHER!!! Yeah, that should do it...

'What's you're real name?'

Yondaime Hokage! HAH!!! PSYCH!!! Hihi! Okay, okay, it isn't. It's... a secret. No, really, if you haven't figured it out, you... I dunno, it's just weird...

'Do you hate the Third Hokage?'

You mean Sarutobi? No, he does most the work. I only do the show-off stuff. It works better with me showing off than him, since I'm a lot sexier. And younger. And SINGLE!!! Hehe... yeah...

'ØWhat do you think of people pairing you up with Sakura or Kyuubi, the Nine-Tail Fox, as a human?'

Ewwww... Sakura's like... 25 years younger than me. And that stupid kyuubi-thing I've so much about is... weird. So... I hate it!

'ØWhy does Sai call Naruto such a disgusting nickname?'

Who's Sai?

'What does Kakashi's face look like?'

It looks like... Have you ever seen a boy? He looks a lot like that. Obvious, isn't it? And I'm aware you guys want to see his face. I myself have only seen it twice after he started wearing his mask. But don't blame him! He has his reasons. You know how his father died, right? Well, he was disgraced, right? Kakashi had always been respected because of him, but when Sakumo, his father, was disgraced, he was. So he got ashamed of who hewas and began to wear the mask. Yeah... don't tell him I told you, he'll kill me! I know I'm a Hokage and he just a Chunin, but have you ever seen him pissed? You don't wanna...

'ØWhat do you think of Naruto inventing such a perverted jutsu, the Sexy no Jutsu?'

I'm proud! But I don't think he has. He's only a year, dude!

'ØWhat do you think of Naruto having a Hyuuga girl falling in love with him?'

Awwww, how cute! You mean Hinata, right? She's the only Hyuuga girl at his age. She's adorable, really!

'Can you accept my free ramen?'

Of course I can! What do you take me for for, an idiot? Who woulden't accept free ramen, except Kakashi, but he's an ass. Thanks a lot, I love ramen!"

_He picks up the next paper._

"More questions from _Emperor Jaden_. Oh, so seeing into the future is bloodline, not Jutsued! Well, many reviewers here have that bloodline... What are you, all sisters and brothers? You made me a andriod that does my paperwork? So that I would have time for my fans? Why, thank you, but I have always time for my fans. Always! But thanks, now I can bother Sarutobi for longer. Haha! You give me ramen again? Thanks; You can never get too much ramen! And donuts? Geez, thanks! Oh, questions...

'ØWho do you think is the hottest female in Konoha or anywhere else?'

Good question! Probably Tsunade-san. 'Cause she'll look young her entire life. And she has big boobs! Yeah...

'ØIf your son ever asks, 'Can I wear an orange jumpsuit', can you tell him no?'

Oh, no, I can't denie my son that. It's his life after- YOU GIVE ME 500 CRATES OF RAMEN IF I DO? Of course I'll say no, because that would be... okay, I'll say no just for the ramen...

'What Øif I told you that Itachi Uchia was the older brother in that question I asked you?'

Wouldn't change much. Or maybe...? Should I kill him? Really? No, I can't! I can't just walk over to his home and tell his mother I have to kill him because therefore! Or maybe...? I'll see about that!"

_He picks up yet another paper._

"Aah, only one question. This is from _leafninja345435_.

'Since you are Naruto's dad, who is his mom?'

Um... yeah... who is that? Wait, wait, it's coming! It's... uh... You know what? I have no idea myself! One day I got drunk and, yeah... hehe... And nine months later Naruto was on my doorstep. So I took care of him! Yeah, I'm so nice!"

_He picks up the last paper._

"The last question is from _isrocks_.

'Is it fun being Hokage?'

Oh yeah! It's fun all right! What did you say, Sarutobi? Responsebility? Sure, I have that too, but... it's mostly just fun. I can boss people around! Yay!"

_He puts away all the papers._

"Aaaah... finished! Oh, that's right. I was telling you guys something special before I was interupted; Next time will be a bit different. I'll bring a guest! Guess who? Iruka Umino! He hasn't been on stuff like this before either I think, and he's so nice to Naruto so... Well, I do hope you can be nice and ask him a couple of questions too. It's your only chanc next time! Just keep that in mind. Well, see you then!"

_He turns off the camera._


	5. Chapter 5

Ø**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **12th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage, Sarutobi & Iruka Umino (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 5:**

_The camera is put on yet again._

"Hello, my beloved fans! Hope you're ready for more questions here at '_HereWith Yondaime_'. Today we have a guest here, Iruka Umino. Si hi!"

"_Hi!_"

"I'm sorry this took so long. Well, anyways! I told you before that Iruka would come, so he should get some questiond too, right? Oh, and Kakashi and I have hooked Obito and Rin together. They just don't act like that around people. So, shall we go at it then? Good!"

_Yondaime picks up a paper and hands it to Iruka._

"Here, you read it!"

"_Okay! At first we have some questions from _yondaime-kun_. Seems to be quite a fan..._"

"Oh yeah!"

"_Um, okay then... the first questiond are for you, Hokage-sama!_"

"Just read them and I'll answer. Like an interview!"

"_Sure!_

_'What do you think of Naruto being paired up with Sasuke?'_

_You sure get awkward questions..._"

"All the time! Well, I think... um, I think it's up to Naruto to choose whoever he wants be with. But I personally like the Hyuuga-girl!"

" _'Do you think Sakura and Sasuke will get together?' _"

"Welll... again, it's up to them. But I think... yes, I think yes!"

" _'Can you please_Ø _make sure that Sakura doesn't get into her Sasuke-love-stage-thing?' _"

"I'm sorry, but no! It's up to her if she wants to make an ass of herself every day, and if she wants me to laugh at her if she gets rejected. Hih! I'm so evil! No, I'm nice! Very nice... yeah... So, no, I can't make sure of that! Will it really happen? Cool! Gotta see that!"

" _'PS: Are you sure I shouldn't change it to Obito-something?' _"

"Well, how can I choose that? Ask your parents, they're the ones who gave you your name, right? Just don't ask if one of your parents happen to be the Fifth Hokage. Um, yeah... hehe... yeaaahhhh..."

"_That's all for you, Hokage-sama._"

"Oh, good! You take over then; I've gotta go pee!"

_Yondaime runs to the bathroom._

"_Does he know people know what he does? Probably not. Okay, guys! I haven't done anything like this before, so don't hate me, okay? Right then..._

_'ØHow would you like to have a loud, hyperactive, ramen eating kid, and also an emo-boy, and Sasuke-fangirls all in one huge class?'_

_Oh no, please no! I don't want that! Will it happen? Say no... YOU'VE GOTTA SAY NO!!! I mean... I'd prefer not to have that, thank you._

_'And a Naruto-fangirl?'_

_He's gonna have a fan? Awwww, you mean Hinata-chan? That's cute! I don't think I would mind that, not at all._

_'ØWould you like the hyperactive boy who is a prankster who like, paints the momument, skips class, has other friends who skip class, does Harem no Jutsu, Sexy no Jutsu, and other perverted jutsu?'_

_Oh... Naruto, eh? Thought so... I like Naruto! He's... funny. And... interesting! Very, very, very interesting._

_'How do you feel about Kakashi?'_

_Hn...?_"

_Iruka suddenly blushes._

"_I... um... that's to say... uhhhh... I don't know him that well. I only know he's... um... a great ninja. And that's... it... I think... ohhhh..._

_'Or Rin?'_

_Or? You mean I could choose to say what I feel about Kakashi? Not that I like him or anything... Oh, well, I'll answer all of them! I like Rin! She's very nice and does everyhting for her friends. I don't know her that much either, but we do talk a bit. She's... I like her!_

_'Or Obito?'_

_He's mean! No, seriosly! That jerk's a... jerk... To me that is. He's always mean to me. I don't think he means to be like that, but... oh, you know what? I think I'm just a bit paranoid. Yeah, I think so. He's probably nice when you get to know him. But I won't! He's scary..._

_'ØHow you like to have a kid who sleeps, one who eats chips, a kid with a dog, and also said emo-boy and hyperactive prankster-ramen loving-skips class-Harem no Jutsu-Sexy no Jutsu boy kiss in class?'_

_Eh? You mean like... all of the... kissing? Um, if I become a teacher, which I'm quite sure I will, I don't want that in class, which you stated. But else, they're free to do what they please. That was all!_"

_Yondaime comes in again._

"Man, I just took that biggest cra- oh, camera... Well, how did it go, Iruka-kun?"

"_Great!_"

_Yondaime picks up the next paper._

"So... _Emperor Jaden _again, eh? Let's hear then! First ones are for me.

'ØIf you ever see Orochimaru again, you should really kill him.'

Argh, enough with the demands now! I- what is it, Iruka?"

" _'I saw in the future: He will try to destroy all ramen, and will amke it so that no one can have ramen for five years.'_

_That's the rest of the review..._"

"Okay, that's it! I'm gonna kill that bastard! Promise you guys! I mean, ramen's at the stake here. Dude!

'ØDo you plan to teach Naruto the Hirashin and Rasengan when he's older?'

Why, yes, of course! He needs to know that! And isn't Rasengan like the coolest ever?"

"_Yes, it's... great..._"

"I know!

'Would you like to see the older selves of the female in Konoha?'

Well, not the grown-ups. Hell if I wanna look at old ladies! But the younger? Sure, but not look at them like that, you know. Just thought I should point that out...

'ØIf a psychoatic boy by the name of Gaara with a demon sealed inside of him by the Kazekage ever came to Konoha for the chuunin exams, and this boy thought the purpose in life was to kill everyone to make him feel alive, would you let Naruto fight him?'

I don't see why not? He would win. Naruto that is, not the psycho. I mean, he's my son, right? Naruto that is again, not the psycho. I think... um, yeah...

'Can you explain to Iruka about my bloodline?'

Sure, but I'm not going to! Kiddiiiing... Okay, Iruka! That bloodline is really rare, so of course almost all the reviewers have it, and it let's them see the future."

"_Cool! Okay, questions for me now._

_'What's it like to be thebest academy teacher ever?'_

_Um... I don't know, I'm not a teacher yet. I'm twelve! But I really want to become one. And you think I'll be the best? Why, thank you, thank you very much!_

_'ØWhat would you do if later in life, you had to teach Naruto, Yondaime's kid in case you didn't know, and he was the greatest prankster of all time?'_

_I woulden't mind! I babysit him quite often, so I'm used to the little weirdo. And I know he' Yondaime-sama's kid._

_'What would you do if someone used the Sexy no Jutsu on you?'_

_Nothing! Oh... maybe get a little nosebleed then... What? I don't even care about women, I-_"

_Iruka puts his hand in front of his mouth and blushes again._

"_Yet! I don't care abou women yet!_

_'Have you met Mizuki?'_

_Yes, he's a friend of mine. My best friend! He's really nice, you should try and get along with him someday. That's that!_"

_Yondaime picks up the next paper._

"Oh... only for me... Iruka-kun, go get yourself something to eat."

"_No thanks, I'm not-_"

"I have ramen!?"

_Iruka runs to the ramen._

"Haha! Cute kid... Aah, from _TWNJ _again. Oh, so that's what your name means. Cool!

'How did you react when you were asked to be Hokage?'

Let's see... at first I wasn't listening, 'cause I was distracted by this cute little dog. Then they told me again and I was lik, 'Geh?', and they all sighed. Then, when they told me the third time, I was distracted by the dog again. After they told me the fourth time, and after they hit me a lot of times, I ran around like a manic. Because I managed getting fire on my hair... After they put out the fire, I went to eat ramen with Naruto.

'How long have you been Hokage?'

Ooooh... let's see... hmmmm... I've doing this... I've been doing... that... About... a week. Yup, a week! Hey, I've been doing a lot in a week! This and that! Wow, dude!

'Even though you are Hokage, do you still train your team?'

Yes, but not for very long now. They'll get a new sensei tomorrow. Kakashi will be Obito and Rin's new sensei. And I think they refuse to have a new team partner. Good for them!"

_He picks up a new paper._

"From _RoBoT HaMsTeR_. Ooh, a new reviewer...

'If you could choose a woman to be Naruto's mom, who would you choose?'

Ah... now that's a good question. I'm not sure... But I think he's okay without a mother. He has me after all!"

_Sarutobi says that's not the best argument he has had._

"Oh, shut up! Let's see now..."

_He picks up a new paper._

"These are from _Aliandry_.

'If Naruto was gay, would you be against it?'

What's the matter with you guys? Do you think entire Konoha is gay or what? But, to answer your question, no, I wouldn't. It's his life and I just want him to be happy.

'You really should kill Oroch-'

Gah, enough already! I'll kill him, okay? Go and celebrate now.

'Are you really sure you don't know who Naruto's mom is?'

Yes! I was drunk, okay? Sorry, but I was. But don't mistake me; Allthough I didn't plan on haveing Naruto, I love him. So, yeah..."

_He picks up yet another paper._

"From _anime-girl98 _again.

'Are you a pervert?'

Yes! I am! Not my fault though...

'Did you notice that?'

Oh, that pattern you noticed? No, but now that you mention it... huh! Awsome! And Kakashi get's to be Naruto's sensei!? HAH! And he hates kids. Sure he's a kid himself, but man, he hates kids. And he starts his sensei career tomorrow. Aaaah... poor Naruto! And will you guys stop talking about me dead? I hate. I don't wanna die..."

_He picks up another paper again._

"This is from _Redcrimsonblood _again. But now he/she is the one to actualy ask me. No, it's nor for me, it's for Iruka. IRUKA-KUN!"

_Iruka comes in, carrying a bowl of ramen._

"_What? Oh, a question..._

_'Are you in love with Kakashi?'_

_Ah...? Mm...?_"

"Iruka, are you all right? Man, you're hot! Do you have a fever? Iruka? Are you dead?"

"_I... I... NO,IDON'TLOVEHIM!HOWCANYOUTHINKTHAT?_"

"Wow, dude! Hey, he is, guys! He really is!"

"_No, I'm not!_"

"Ooooh, it says here yo two should have s- AAAARGH!!!"

_Iruka tries to choke Yondaime._

"_I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH KAKASHI!!!_"

"Right, okay..."

_Iruka lets him go._

"_I have to go! Please excuse me!_"

_Iruka leaves with his ramen._

"Awwww, so cute! But you know, he is in love with Kakashi. And Kakashi's in love with him too. Why else would he be collecting dolphind, huh? So don't worry, I think they'll get together."

_He picks up the next paper._

"This is another one from _leafninja345435_.

'Would you let Naruto marry me if I gave you 50 crates of ramen?'

Sure, but I'm not sure if he wants to though. Now, GIVE ME RAMEN!!! Okay, that was mean... by me... Right then."

_He picks up the last paper._

"Okay, from _isrocks _again.

'Are you really an Uchiha and is Sasuke your son like that one roamer?'

Um... I didn't understand that last part, but I can assure you; I am not an Uchiha! And Sasuke isn't my son. I think... damn, dude! Well, that's all! Oh, and by the way; The time has changed to around 4 instead of 3, in case you didn't notice."

_Iruka comes back._

"I thought you didn't want to be here?"

"_Kakashi's outside..._"

"Oh, you're rush?"

_Iruka looks at him, blushing._

"_I..._"

_Then he smiles._

"_Yeah..._"

"Haha! I knew it! Well, that's all! Tomorrow will be only me again, but if there's someone you would like to have her, tell me. Okay? Good! See you tomorrow then!"

_Iruka waves while Yondaime turns the camera off._


	6. Chapter 6

Ø**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **13th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 6:  
**

_The camera is turned on in the Hokage's office again._

"Hi, we're back, and blah-blah-blah, you've herad it before. Wasn't it great having Iruka over? Yeah, I think it was too. He's so cool! Today I've got like, many questions. Gah, it's many! Should just start I suppose..."

_The picks up the first paper._

"Hmmmm... from _RoBoT HaMsTeR_.

'What would you do if ramen went extinct?'

Haha! That ain't gonna happen! Hehe... right? Right??? Y-you-you're kidding, r-ri-right? Dude! Come on! It's not going extinct!? RIGHT???"

_Yondaime sulks a bit before he picks up the next paper._

"Okay, I'm fine! Breath, Yondaime, breath... Okay, the next ones are from _Redcrimsonblood _again. That's nice! Oh, it's from her friend again, _RabidFangirl_. Don't you ever log in? Just wondering...

'I found a perfect name for, Arashi Kazama, how do you like it?'

You found a name for me? Who are you, my mother? I have a name! Yeah, my mother, who aren't you, gave me my name.

'Can you bring in Itachi-kun next?'

Um, I thought the reviewers wanted me to kill him!? Well, I'll think about it! Could be cool, to have an Uchiha here."

_He picks up another paper._

"Aah, more from my little clone, _yondaime-kun_. Always nice to hear from you! So you want either Obito or Kakashi here, eh? Well, we'll see, won't we?

'Did you know that Iruka secretly has a crush on Kakashi?'

OH, DO I? Of course, I mean, we all know how he acted last time, right? So funny! But it's not very secretly, you know. Everybody knows it! Except Kakashi, but he's an ass.

'If you had another team, who would you like to train?'

Oh man! Hard! Um... I guess I would love to have Iruka on my team. He would do everything I'd ask him to do. And possibly... Hayate! 'Cause he's totally an outsider and he's funny. Hehe... SickBoy... hihi! Okay, the last one... uh... not sure! I would like to train Genma, but... I dunno! I guess it would be the three of them.

'Don't you agree?'

Geh? What do you- Oh, to that! That Sakura and Sai should get together. Aaaah... no! 'Casue Sai's an ass! I have no idea who the hell he is, but really, listen to the name! I'm Sai, and I'm so upfucked! Gah, sounds so... GAY! Not that I have anything against gay people, you know that! But if he's gay, he shouldn't be with a girl. Hehe! Upfucked! I invented that word! Someone might use it too, but I invented it as well! Just so you know...

'ØDon't you think that Naruto and Hinata, and Sai and Sakura make, great couples?'

Naruto and Hinata, yes! Sakura and Sai, no! I don't really care if you think they should get together; I don't think so!

'Can you get Sai and have Sakura hang around with him?'

Again, who's Sai? Well, if I find out, I suppose I could do that. Everybody needs friends, right? I want a friend! I only hang out with Sarutobi, and that sucks."

_Sarutobi says he should choke on soda._

"Sure! Fine! I'll go choke on a coke if you want it! Then I'll just have Tsunade-sama to save my life, and then I'll shove the bottle up your sorry ass! Sounds good? No, I don't think so!"

_Sarutobi tells him to shut it._

"Fine, I will, MOTHER!!!"

_Sarutobi flips it._

"Bastard... anyways, let's keep going!"

_He picks up the next paper._

"Ooooh, from a new reviewer. _RuKiA RoJaS _is the name!

'ØDo you put gel in your hair to make them spiky, or do you never brush it in the morning?'

I'm gonna tell you a little secret! I make my own gel! It's forbidden of strange toxic reasons, so don't tell anybosy, okay?"

_Sarutobi reminds him that what he says is sent to directly to the internet._

"Shit... now I'm gonna have that awkward meeting with ANBU again... oh well! Oh, and I don't die from it because I'm great!

'ØWhat is the first will you do if you're alive again in the manga?'

Again with the death things! Heeeey... I'm in a manga? Well, what would you know? Cool! What manga is that? Is it possible to bye it in Konoha? It could have been '_Yondaime, the Perfect Dude_', but I doubt it; I don't die in that manga! Besides, I haven't published it yet. Yeah...

'Do you smoke?'

Of course! NOT!!! I'm not an idiot! Those who smoke are stupid! It doesn't matter if their IQ is over 200, they're still incredebly stupid. Who the hell wants to waste their time trying to be cool and smoke? Really, who wants to throw away their life on that? For every smoke you take,you lose seven minutes of your life. Seven! So if any of my reviewers and fans smoke, stop! Take an advice from Yondaime Hokage! Hmmmm... maybe I should make a new law in Konoha...? We'll see."

_He picks up a new paper._

"Let's see, more from _isrocks_. Cool!

'Which came first; The chicken or the egg?'

Well, that's obvious, isn't it? The egg! Then the chicken! You eat egg for breakfast and chicken for dinner.

'How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if if a wood chuck could chuck wood?'

Haha! Words... so many weird words... Okay! Well, that depends! If the wood chuck, let's say, smoke. It's in a very bad condision then. It wouldn't be able to chuck so much wood then. But if it wasn't smoking, it would chuck a lot more wood. See? I'M GREAT!!!"

_He goes to get some ramen with chicken and comes back to pick up the next paper._

"Mmmm... ramen... Okay, some more questions from _anime-gril98_. How nice...

'Is it true?'

That I'm the leader of Akatsuki? Of course I'm not! That's silly! You are probably a bit tired, right? Nah, you're just crazy fan asking whatever pops into your sleepy mind. Fine, so you're maybe not that sleepy. Heh... I'm so weird...

'This is for Obito-'

Oh, I'm sorry, but he's on a mission with his new sensei. Kakashi that is, he was made sensei today. But I'll tell him you wanted to talk to him later, okay? Okay!

'ØWhat if I told you that somebody made a anime-show and manga of your son Naruto being a ninja and all the Genin his age are trying to make it through to accomplish their dream?'

Well, at first I would say, 'Well, at first I would say', and then I'd be like, AWSOME! That'd be totally ass-kicking. I need to stop saying these weird words... geez! Will this happen? You probably have that bloodline, don't you? Who's gonna make it? Ooooh, can I play Naruto? No, no! I wanna be Naruto's father! Because I really am his father, so that would be an easy part. Easy and SEXY! Oh yeah!

'How do you find all the time to answer our questions when you're the Hokage with lots of paperwork?'

I believe I have explained it before, but maybe I wasn't so very clear... Okay, here's the deal I made with Sarutobi: He does the paperwork, which I hate and he doesn't mind, then I'll fight evil dudes and shoe off. 'Cause I'm the young, hot, sexy, attractive and handsome one. He's just old! And latly there hasn't been any attacks and stuff, so I got some free time. Since all I do is having to watch a little kid, I have time for you guys. Ain't I nice?

'ØSarutobi, how would you feel if I told you that your grandson in the future would have a closet pervert for a sensei, Ebisu, and would learn that perverted jutsu from Naruto?'

Wha-? You wanna talk to the old guy? But I'm the handsome one... oh, fine! SARUTOBI, YOU HAVE A QUESTION, DAMMIT!!!"

_Sarutobi comes in._

"Here!"

_Yondaime gives him the paper, sulking._

"_Why, thank you, _anime-girl98_. Yes, what would I feel? Ebisu, eh? Great kid, great kid. So he's a closet pervert? I guess I wouldn't mind. Naruto? Um... great... kid, sure... very, uh... great... Well, I gues that would be... I don't know! At least he would be happy, right? I just wish to see people happy! Guess I wouldn't mind..._"

"You guess you wouldn't mind? What kind of answer is that? Here's what my answer would be like: I wouldn't mind at all, 'cause we're all either perverts or closet perverts. But Ebisu... that kid should go and get a haircut! 'Cause he's an ass and I say so! As for Naruto teaching my grandson that perverted Jutsu... NO WAY!!! I would teach him that! Because I'm Hokage, and Naruto isn't."

"_You would actually answer like that?_"

"Yes! Yes, I would! So much better than your stupid answer..."

"_Do your fans understand what you mean when you answer them?_"

"No, I don't think so! Now, leave!"

_Sarutobi leaves._

"Geez, dude...

'Haishi, how do you-'

Ah, sorry, he's not here now!

'Iruka, do you ever-'

He was her last time. But I believe he doesn't wonder why his name means sea-dolphin, or a pool-full-of-dolphins. It just does, right?

'Kakashi, your-'

Gah, how many questions do you have for others than me? Yes, Kakashi knows his name means scarecrow, and he hates it, so I don't know what he feels about it. Hey,do you know what his last name means? Field! Hih, it's so funny teasing him. What was Sakumo thinking anyways?

'Was it you who named your son Naruto?'

Yup, that was me! Cool, huh? You put Naruto in ramen! And it teastes awsome...

'Did you do this on purpose?'

What, because it means whirlpool too? Nah, it just sounded so cool. Besides, if people ask me, 'Hey do do you like more than anything', I can be like, 'Naruto and ramen'. See? Perfect match! But no, not on purpose, not on purpose... Oh, that was all your questions? Only nine? Dude, you ask a lot! I like that!"

_He picks up the last paper._

"This is from _xLonely Moonx_. Ooh, you're new too! Funny!

'Who were you teamed up with for your Genin team?'

You need it for a fanfic? Well, I don't really like talking about them, but...no, I don't wanna talk about them! Oh, why do I get reminded of sad stuff? It's supposed to be funny! Well, fine, if you promise to send me the link to that story. It was Kiyoshi Aikiyama. He was my best friend! And Mai Kuma. She was a really cool friend too! So you better send that link to me.

'Kill Orochimaru and Ita-'

Yeah, yeah! I'm working on it... Si hi to Kakashi from you? Sure, why not? Well, that was all for now! See you all tomorrow!"

_Yondaime, who's sick of his new camera because Jiraya got a better one, thorows the camera out of the window._


	7. Chapter 7

Ø**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **14th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 7:**

_Yondaime's new camera is put on._

"So, guys, ready for more questions? Yeah, me too, but first there's something importent I have to tell you: Someone named _Sigfried27_ has reported me for some reason. I don't see why since he/she did NOT warn me as he/she states! All the person did was simply put the 'Entries not allowed: Blah-blah-blah' thing in a review! I don't look at that as a warning! But I have asked him/her what I have to do, so I think it'll work out. But I decided to change this a bit, since I think it's because that's the reason. The two-liners-stuff. Sorry, guys, let's get back!"

_He takes a breath and picks up a paper._

"So, let's start... The first ones are... not questions... from _Redcrimsonblood_'s friend, _RabidFangirl_. This... um, right... Okay, if you others want to know what she says, read her review. Geez, I'm sorry, dude! How should I know you didn't have an account? Of course I like you being nice; You're like, one of the greatest fans I have here! And please, don't report me. I've been that already and I'm trying to fix it. Man, I never meant to insult anyone, I really didn't! And that about the mother coment; I'M SO SORRY!!! I didn't know! Please, don't be mad, I'll do anything! I'll go out with you! I'll treat you to ramen the rest of your life! ANYTHING!!! So, please, forgive me, the ass I am..."

_He picks up the next paper._

"Please, no more flaming! I'm too young to lose my show... Oh, good, it's a question. From _isrocks_.

'Did Jiraya ever read perverted stuff to your team when they were little?'

No, not really! Okay, maybe a bit... He read parts from his book to them and asked what they thought. Kakashi liked everyhting of some straaaange reason... Well, Jiraya did ruin him as a kid, along with Tsunade. So... yeah, he did read a bit..."

_He picks up the next paper._

"GAH??? That's LONG! Man... okay then, _Raikiri-no-Jutsu_. Many questions, wow...

**How much sleep have you lost with Naruto crying his eyes out?**

What, he cried his eyes out? I thought he still had them when I checked? Oh, it's a metafore. Got it... hehe... Um, well... HELL OF A LOT!!! That kid won't shut up! I have to get up, what, three times every single night. It's like a ever-lasting mission! I hate it... Hey, wanna adopt? Just kiddiiiing... So I've lost a lot of sleep, yeah! But I guess it's woth it. He's so cute!

**How many times has Rin offered to look after little Naru-chan?**

Hehe! Naru's a girl in '_Love Hina_'. Hehe! My son's a girl! Hehe- wait, that's not good? Okay, okay, I'll stop getting distracted. Well, really many times. She loves babysitting. So of curse I let her. I'm not stupid, so... yeah, many times!

**Did you knoe Sakumo quite well?**

Oh yeah, we were good friends! We used to hang around, doing nothing importent just to waste time. It was really a lot of fun. I miss it... But at least we had a hell of a time!

**How long did it take for you to perfect _Hiraishin no Jutsu_?**

I'm not quite done with it yet. It takes a lot of time! But it's coming along very good! And quite fast too!

**What's your favorite animal?**

I really love questions like these! Gimme more like these! I'm nore sure... I like frogs a lot, they're funny. But I also love... I dunno! I guess I have to say frogs, yeah, frogs! They're funny..."

_He looks at the rest of the questions._

"Oh... for my team... Listen, they can't, still on a mission. But I promise you; They will answer all your questions tomorrow! They promissed and Kakashi never goes back on that. That's something I like about him.

**By the way, I'm kidnapping Kaka-**

WHAT? Hey, don't do that! You- haha, you screwed up! He's on a mission. Hehe... hey... you can kidnap him when he comes back... Nah, he'd never let that happen! Or...? Great, you got me all worried! Oh well, at least I'm worrying about something else than the fact that Gai's watching my son..."

_He picks up another paper._

"Ou-kie... From _RoBoT HaMsTeR_. That's cool!

**If I gave you 50 bowls of ramen, would you take off your pants?**

Yup! Hey, if you give me 50 bowls of ramen I'll do it next time, I swear! And if at least five reviewers do it, I'll strip for while I sing. Tomorrow that is. With my team here... hmmm, that might scar them for life... But we don't care about that, now, do we? Well, I'd scar Obito and Rin I suppose, not Kakashi. He's a pervert and he's gay. 'Cause he's in love with Iruka, he's-"

_Yondaime gets up and sings while he dances._

"Right, sorry about that! So come on, gimme ramen and I'll strip. Hehe! I should make a sign; '_Feed Yondaime Hokage and watch him strip_'. I think I'll go do that! That'd be so funny!"

_He laughs for some time before looking up._

"Um, sorry! I just- haha... Okay, okay, sorry! Oh, _Scarlet Butterfly91 _had a question.

**I'm having a bachelorette-party tomorrow and was wondering if you could be a stripper?**

Uuuuhhhh... sssso... getting married, huh? Good for you! What?"

_Sarutobi comes in and says that _Scarlet Butterfly91_ isn't getting married._

"WHAT? Then why would she have a- Oooohhhh... I get it! You're faking it! Just to see me strip! Cooool... Well, I suppose I could come. Tomorrow? Nah, I'll come tonight and sleep over. That sounds fair? Good! But you better have ramen! Oh, you live in Norway, that's true. They don't have ramen there... Well, bye me some noodles then!"

_He stands up and stretches._

"I guess that's all, dudes! See you tomorrow then, if it works out with the reported-thing. I'm sure it'll all work out! Don't forget Kakashi, Obito and Rin will come tomorrow! Bye and Happy Valentine's Day!"

_He turns off the camera, which is better than Jiraya's._


	8. Chapter 8

Ø**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **15th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage, Sarutobi, Kakashi Hatake, Obito Uchiha & Rin (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 8:**

_The Fourth Hokage turns on his way-better-than-Jiraya's-camera and gets behind his desk._

"Aaaand we're back to '_Here With Yondaime_'. It feels great, really great! I totally love this! Okay, so I promised you guys that if I got five reviewers who gave lots of ramen, I'd strip. Well, I didn't get much ramen. Bastards... Kidding, you're not, you're all wonderful! Buuuut, I'll strip anyways!"

_Yondaime gets up, sings '_I'm too Sexy_' while stripping._

"Man, that was fun! Ooooh, comfy boxers... I think I'll wear nothing but them today. That's okay? Suuuure! And as promised, I have with me my team today. Kakashi, Obito and lovley Rin!"

_The three of them just stare at him because he stripped in front of them._

"Well, now they're scarred for life... well, maybe not you, eh, Kakashi?"

K: "_... no..._"

_Yondaime picks up the paper from before._

"So not enthusiastic! Okay, let's start then! I promised _Raikiri-no-Jutsu_ to give her answers, so... yeah, let's take those questions first.

**Kakashi; What is, in your opinion,the best torture you've every subjected Obito to, you sadistic little scarecrow?**"

K: "_You just had to add that last thing, didn't you, sensei?_"

"It's stated so in the review."

_Kakashi glares at him._

K: "_Well, this question is genious! The best torture... Mah, hard to say, I've tortured him in so many cool ways... But it was this one time, aboout a year ago, I pulled down his pants, shoved my foot up his ass, then a kunai, then a foot again. Then I tied him up, threw him off a bridge, then pulled him up again and sung '_Mary had a Little Lamb_' in a very crappy voice. Then I shoved my foot up his ass again, carried him to the hospital and said, 'Haha, you're so gonna die'._"

_The three others stare at him, Obito completly horrified._

"Ou-kiiii... next question is for Obito. Ah, it's the same one, just about Kakashi."

O: "_Well, I... uh... I don't know! No matter what I plan he always knows about it! That's why I hate the fact that he's a genious. He's too smart! It's not fair! Daaaamn... Hey, wait, I did torture him once! I found this puppy and he totally loves dogs, so I-_"

K: "_Hey, shut it!_"

O: "_No way! So I was like, 'Hey, Kakashi, I found this dog and if you don't be my slave for a whole day, I'll throw it off a bridge'. I wouldn't do it of course, but he-_"

K: "_Okay, shut up now!_"

O: "_No, it's funny! So he started to cry. It was so funny! HAHAHAHAAAA!_"

"Then why didn't you remember it?"

O: "_Well... He found out I wouldn't kill it, so he adopted the puppy and named it Pakkun or something. And then he trained the dog to bite people and... yeah, you know... bastard..._"

"Oh! Okay then! Next question, let's see... Did you really cry, Kakashi?"

K: "_NO!_"

"Hehe! Thought you did... Okay, for Rin.

**If you and Obito had a kid, what would you call it?**"

R: "_Um, I don't know... If it had been a girl I'd call her Mai, I think. If it was a boy I think I'd call him Kiyoshi. Obito wouldn't be allowed to named them! He wants his future son to be named Obito Junior. Poor kid! And if it was a girl, Miss Obito Junior! It's evil! I swear, if we get kids, he won't be allowed to touch them._"

"... rrrright! So the next one... for Obito.

**What do you think of little emo-boy Sasuke?**"

O: "_I like him! He's like... you know, like... a relative! Yeah, and that's awsome, 'cause he's my relative. And I'm totally cool! I kick ass, dude! But Sasuke's a bit... weird... He's so... emo, yeah, so emo! He's creepy, and he keeps stealing my kunais. I don't know what he does with them though..._"

"He cuts himself! So, a question for Rin again.

**If you could adopt Hinata or Sakura, who would you adopt?**

Now I'm curious..."

R: "_I think... Hinata! She's so...I don't know, she's just really cute. And she doesn't cry so much, she's quite quiet. She's adorable!_"

_The three guys look at her._

O: "_You think she's gonna try steal Hinata?_"

K: "_Oh yeah!_"

"Let's keep on, shall we? Hey, Kakashi? Did this reviewer try to kidnap you? Yes? Yeah, she said she would..."

_He picks up a new paper._

"Hey, this is from _Sasuke1991_! She's the owner's other best friend! Now what does she want to know?

**Why do you like ramen?**

Huh... interesting question. So of course I'll give you an interesting nswer! Bacause it tastes good! Wasn't so interesting after all... sounded better in my head..."

O: "_I can answer that for you, sensei! He likes ramen because it has that sweet, yet strong taste! You cannot possibly resist it! Ecpesially Iciraku Ramen, they're the greatest. If you come down this week, thay have special-made ramen to celebrate Valentine's Day, and you get every third bowl free, and-_"

K: "_Do you like, make adveritsement for them or what?_"

O: "_As a matter of fact, I do!_"

_Yondaime picks up a new paper while Kakashi and Obito fight._

"These are from _yondaime-kun_. Of course, many questions. Didn't except anything else. Right then, the first is for... ME!

**What do you like to do, besides eating ramen?**

Ooh, eating ra-... men... Besides that, okay! Um, I like reading. It's fun! And I like being sensei, by Naruto's father, and tease Sarutobi. Hehehe... I'm so awsome!

**How's Naru-kun doing?**

Oh, he's fine, just fine! He's been- wait a minute! Why do you wanna know? Are you some kind of stalker? Nah, probably not... or mayby...?"

K: "_Don't worry, sensei, they're not stalkers, either of them._"

"How do you know?"

K: "_I just know!_"

"Creepy boy... anyways...

**Do you like Icha icha?**

Haven't read yet. I think I might steal Kaka- ... um, forget that, Kakashi-kun!"

_He smiles with a fake smile; Kakashi glares at him again._

"Um, yeah... Okay, questions for you, Kakashi.

**Who would you want to be on your team?**"

K: "_Anyony, as long as their not like Obito. I mean come on! The guy dances around in the mission room, pretending to be a flamingo, with a boxer on his freaking head! That's... no, Obito, it isn't creative. It's crazy!_"

"Ou-ki...

**What do you think about Iruka?**

Ooooh, wants to know what you think of Iruka-kun. Hihi!"

K: "_You're an idiot, did you know? To answer the question... I don't feel like telling you! What's it to you what I think of others? Mayby sensei's right, you do stalk... nah, you're just crazy, all of you! Iruka's a whimp! Just had to point that out..._"

"And you're mean as always...!

**Or Rin? Or Obito?**

Answer them both."

K: "_Rin's cool! She's nice, I guess, but really annoying. To tell the truth, I don't know her that well... Obito? He's an idiot! I hate that jerk! He can't even protect himself, look!_"

_Kakashi points over at Obito who lies on the floor, half-dead._

K: "_And I didn't do that! ... okay, I did! But it wasn't my fault, he was annoying, he-_"

"Have you notice that no matter what the questions is, the answer leads to some kind of explanation, like, every time?"

_Silence; Only the sound of grasshoppers._

"Haha, made you shut up! Som questions for Rin.

**Do you want to be with Obito the rest of your life?**"

_Rin looks over at her pathetic boyfriend._

R: "_I... don't... know... Maybe!?_"

" Hehe, cool...!

**Who would you want to be on your team?**"

R: " _I would like to have Hinata! And... probably Ino. And Tenten! It would be girl talk all the time and no stupid boys would ruin anything! A team with only girls... A distant dream...!_"

"Hm, creepy... Questions for Obito. Hey, is he alive or what? He is? Oh, good! I think... Anyways, questions.

**Do you think that a certain dolphin man and Kakashi should be together?**"

O: "_Totally! It's Iruka you mean, right? Yeah, I think so; I could call Kakashi gay then! Actually I do anyways, but I wouldn't be lying. Oh, you would care, Scarecrow! Haha, it's so funny calling you that! 'Cause you hate it!"_

"See? I'm telling you we all get distracted! Right, answer this too, Obito.

**What do you like to do in your spare time?**

Yes, Obito, what do you do?"

O: "_Let's see... I eat ramen, eat ramen, ramen, ramen, ramen, ramen, eat ramen with Yondaime, ramen, ramen, ramen. Oh, and tease Kakashi! That's stupid, I almost die everytime. But it's worth it! I also take Rin to dates. We eat ramen the! Ramen! RAMEN! Ramen, ramen, ramen, ramen! Ramen!_"

"Suuuure...!

**Who would you want to have on your team?**"

O: "_Anyone but someone like Kakashi! 'Cause he's an ass! I'd like someone who's hyper. Like ME! And another one. Who's ALSO like ME!_"

_Yondaime picks up a paper while listenung to Obito's non-sense._

"Now, questions from _isrocks_.

**Kakashi, Obito, Rin, are you a three some + Iruka?**

Yeah... did anybody get that? 'Cause I didn't!"

O: "_Nope!_"

R: "_No, sorry!_"

K: "_Not at all!_"

_Yondaime picks up a new paper._

"So, sorry, but we didn't quite understand that, dude! Sorry! So, more from _Redcrimsonblood _and _RabidFangirl_. Oh, you forgive me, that's great! Thanks!Yes, Gai watched him, but he's okay, don't worry! Oi, Kakashi, a question for you!

**When will you and Iruka-kun have-**

Um, yeah..."

K: "_What? Have what?_"

"Um... sex..."

K: "_Wha-? Geh-? Uhhhh... I'm 13. He's twelve. So... not yet... I mean, never! I mean... I mean... oh, man..._"

"Haha, you screwed up! Okay, okay, I'll stop. Obito, Rin; Question for you two.

**What do you think of Uchihas with pink hair?**"

R: ""

O: ""

K: "_Wow, great answer... not! I know what Uchihas look like with pink hair! I have a picture of Obito after I made his hair pink._"

_Kakashi shows you the picture and Obito slams his head on the desk while Yondaime picks up another paper._

"Cute! Hey, more from _Sasuke1991_. For Obito.

**Why do you always use stupid excuses that no one is going to believe?**

Yes, why?"

O: "_Um... being creative? Well, I don't know, okay!? Geez, I just say the first thing that pops into my mind!_"

K: "_No wonder your excuses suck then; It's your mind after all._"

_Obito attacks Kakashi, but Kakashi wins and leaves Obito in a half-dead state again._

"Ou-kiiii... question for you, Freak! I mean Kakashi!

**How many masks do you have?**"

K: "_Three!_"

"That's it? That's all you're gonna say? Oh wait, she has another question for you?

**Are you in love with Iruka?**

Yess, he is!"

K: "_No, I'm NOT! I'm a dude! He's a dude!_"

"Yes, that is called being homosexual, Kakashi! You should know what that is, you little pervert. And you shouldn't speak bad of gay people; If humans are able to be gay, some are meant to be like that! Got it?"

K: "_Yes, but I'm not-_"

_Yondaime picks up a new paper while Kakashi tries to rxplain himself._

"Question from _RoBoT HaMsTeR_. Diiiigg...

**If you had to replace ramen with something else, what would it be?**

Suecide! Nah, not really! It would be... oh, I know! 'SMASH'! What, Kakashi? Candy? No, it's not, it's chocolate-covered snacks. NO, IT'S NOT CANDY!!! Okay, it is... But that would be what I'd replaced it with! Oh, 'SMASH' is Norwegian good stuff you can get in... Norway... yeah, it's great! Well, that was all!"

_Sarutobi comes in to tell Yondaime something, but when he sees him in only boxers, he tells him to get dressed instead._

"Why? I've been wearing nothing else since I stripped! Geez, what a jerk..."

_Yondaime, still in nothing but his underwear, goes over to the camera._

"Oh, um, Kakashi, Rin? Take Obito to the hospital, will you? I don't think Kakashi went easy on him that last time."

K: "_He deserved it!_"

"Sure, sure..."

_The camera is turned off yet again to fangirls disapointment, because they cannot see him in just boxers anymore._


	9. Chapter 9

Ø**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **16th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 9:**

_The camera is turned on again, but too bad for the fan girls, he's wearing clothes._

"Hi, this is like the coolest thing at the internet ever, '_Here With Yondaime_'. Man, I love this! But I'm sorry to say it's soon all over. Sunday will be the last time I'll be here to answer your questions. So make sure you ask everything fast! Just so you know, okay? Oh, and feel sorry for me; I've been sick today! And Tsunade-sama's all... You know what she's like, you're all stalkers. I mean fans, you're all fans!"

_Yondaime picks up the first question._

"We have more from _RoBoT HaMsTeR_. That's great, I like it when I get fans!

**If you could have ten whishes, other than ramen, what would they be?**

Oooh, ten? That's pretty many... But the first one be that Naruto gets a great future, even including ramen. Yeah, I really hope that for him. The second... I'm stuck! I don't know, dude! Let's see, um... Oh, I know! That Obito and Rin will have a great life together. And the third is that Kakashi and Iruka will have a great life together. It's so obvious they'll get together, eh? The fourth would be... Oh, that they made 'SMASH' here in Konoha! And the fifth would be... Gahd, who would have thought it's so complicated?"

_He sits still for ten minutes to think._

"Oh, oh, oh! I know the fifth wish! That I could come up with wishes easier! The sixth..."

_He thinks for ten more minutes._

"Well, now I know my fifth wish didn't come true. Dammit! Oh yeah, I wish Obito will do something to Kakashi, something so I can laugh at him. I'm so mean! But Kakashi deserves it, the little ass! He thinks he's so great. But he isn't... Fine, he is, but he's still an ass! Now I know the seventh too! That my manga will be published! Then you'd all read it, right? Of course you would! The eight would be to be invisible! Not all the time, but to peak on girls! Hehe! Awsome! What, you all know I'm a pervert, no secret. So the nineth wish... I dunno, that you asked me for eight wishes instead of ten? Yeah, I suppose. Or nine, since I just made up a nineth wish. And the tenth would be that Orochimaru and Itatchi didn't die from getting a cold. Now I can't kill them like I promised you guys. But at least they're dead, eh?"

_He picks up the next paper._

"From _isrocks_. You just have to give me hard questions too, don't you?

**What's the meaning of life?**

How the hell should I know? Okay, I'll try to answer it. Okay, just wait a moment, gotta think here... Oh, I know! To laugh at others! Hehe! Nah, maybe not, that's mean. It's to make others happy, I suppose. But what's the meaning of their life? Dammit! I guess we all have each opinion of what the meaning of life is. I personaly think it doesn't have a meaning. But you're free to chose what you believe."

_He picks up the last paper._

"Huh! I didn't get many reviewers this time... But what the heck, _Emperor Jaden_ has three, so... yeah. You've been sick? Aw, that's too bad! I'm sick today. Hope you're better though...

**Do you think you could convince the Mizukage to let you borrow Zabusa Momochi for the next show?**

Mizukage? Who the hell is that? Oh, the Mizukage, got it! Hehehehe... Nnnno! Doesn't trust me! But if we both get drunk... yes, that's genious! Or I could just kidnap him! Or I could make Kakashi, Obito and Rin kidnap him! Rin probably wouldn't, but Kakashi and Obito would. Yeah, I'll try that! By the way, who's Zabusa? Haha... hahahahaaaa! Za... busa... Hihi! Do you know what 'busa' means? In Norwegian it means 'the bogger'! HAHAHAHAAAA!!! And 'za'? That sounds like 'sa' in Norwegian. That means 'said'! Said the Bogger! HAHA!!! So funny... Yes, I study Norwegian! I know Japanese and English, so... hihi! Bogger!"

_He wipes away his tears._

"Okay then, next question. Hihi...

**Think you could teach me Rasengan?**

I dunno! Do you know all about Chakra and stuff? If not, I can't! If you do, I dunno! I suppose I could... We'll see, okay?

**Did you know you will be the greatest Hokage of all time until Naruto becomes Hokage?**

Of course! I'm like, so great! Naruto's gonna be Hokage? The next or what? Nah, I don't think he'll become the next. I thinkKakashi's gonna make Hokage too. But of course Naruto will, he's my son. Again, my son! So, yeah... And I'm great!"

_He puts away the papers._

"Hmmmm... what to do know? Oh, I know, I could show you adorable pictures of me as a kid."

_He shows you pictures of himself as a kid._

"And here's Naruto!"

_He shows you pictures of Naruto._

"Ewwww... here's Sarutobi! What a disgusting kid..."

_Sarutobi comes in, yells at him and flips it._

"Geez, sor-ry! But it's not my fault you weren't as cute as me! I think it's an Uzumaki thing. It's probably the bloodline. If I have a bloodline like that... Anyways, I'm hot! Hey, guys, wanna know something about Kakashi? So I told you about why he wears that damn mask? Because of his father? Well, I was wrong! Well, kinda. He wears it because of his bloodline. Yeah, he has a bloodline like that. If he shows his face to anybody, that person is totally hypnozed. Cool, eh? Reason I know is 'cause Obito pulled down his mask. He and Rin haven't been completly sane yet. And this happened yesterday! Allthough it is a cool Jutsu-like thing, it uses hell of a lot Chakra! So that's why he waers a mask!"

_He sits there without doing anything._

"Hey, wanna know something about Rin? She's a medic-nin. She's really, really, really good and saves Obito's life after he's been beaten up by Kakashi. Or her... She might be as good as Tsunade-sama some day, it's awsome."

_He sits still for another moment._

"Hey, wanna know something about Obito too? He's an idiot!"

_Even more silence._

"Okay, I think we'll finish this now. Bye, guys! And review more, please!"

_The camera is turned off again._


	10. Chapter 10

**H**Ø**ere With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **18th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage & Sarutobi (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 10:**

_The camera is turned on in Yondaime's office._

"Hello, you cool fans! This is '_Here With Yondaime_', but not the last show after all. You heard me! It's NOT the last show! I know I said so, but I changed my mind, since you didn't want me to quit. Happy? Yeah, me too! And I'm sorry I didn't respond yesterday, but I've been very busy. I'm leaving for London in two days, so... you know... I'm gonna stay there for a couple of days, but I promise I'll answer more when I get home. Still, I think I have time to answer a few questions today."

_Yondaime picks up a paper._

"Okay then, from _ItachiUchiha17_. Hey, ain't I supposed to kill you? No, Itachi died I think... oh, whatever.

**Why does Kakashi keep denying his man love for Iruka?**

I dunno, 'cause he doesn't want to be called gay by Obito? Maybe I should ask him!? Yeah, I'll do that.

**ØIs he doing it because he actually has man love for Obito and can't admit it or show it unless he beats the crap out of Obito?**

Um... noooo...? I don't think so. I mean, he's totally in love with little Iruka, right? And besides, Obito's together with Rin. And why would he have to beat him up? I mean... why?

**Does Rin have woman love for Hinata?**

Uh... no!? Come on, she's like twelve years older than her."

_He picks up a new paper._

"I know this goes fast, but I don't have a choice. Veeeery busy! So, questions from _RuKiA RoJaS_.

**Are you gay?**

Nnnno! Why do you think that? I have a son, dammit. With a woman! But I still don't know who she is.

**Do you know how to dance?**

Why, yes, of course! I danced for you, or rather stripped, some days ago. I kick ass!

**ØDuring a night, if a drunken woman ask you to sleep with her, what will you anwser?:  
A: "Yes baby!"  
B: "Eat shit ,you freakin woman!"  
C: Slap her in the face and steal all her money and run away.  
D: None of these answer (must explain then).  
**I have to say D. It has happened already, but shhhh. Must exokain? Okay then! Um... First I'd pull her pants/skirt down, shove my foot up her ass, then a-... hmmmm... I get this feeling that this has happened before!? Oh well! Okay, I'd be like, 'Not before I'm drunk, you drunk weirdo!', and then I'd be like... I dunno, I'd just do what I'd feel like, I guess."

_He walks over to the camera when Sarutobi comes in and asks why he was done so quickly._

"Don't have time! Have to pack, you know... Dudes, I'm sorry, but like I said, I don't have more time. Answer the rest in some days. Oh, and you can ask questions for Hayate, Genma, Izumo, Kotetsu and Raidou next time. So do that, will you? Bye!"

_He turns the camera off._


	11. Chapter 11

**H**Ø**ere With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **25th & 26th of February, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **Yondaime Hokage, Sarutobi, Hayate, Genma, Izumo, Kotetsu & Raidou (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 11:**

_Yondaime turns on his camera again after a really long time._

"Hi, dudes, and welcome back to '_Here With Yondaime_'. It's been a long time, eh? But I did tell you I was leaving for London. And man, did I have fun? Oh yeah, it was awsome! But I doubt you want to know about that. And now I have quite many questions, so prepare for them. And I have here with me Hayate, Genma, Izumo, Kotetsu and Raidou."

_He picks up a paper from before he left on a vecation._

"Oh my gahd, many. Oh, they're from _anime-girl98_. Then I understand... Okay, first question in a long time now.

**What would you get if you have a Hyuuga and Naruto have a kid?**

I wouldn't get a shit, but their kid would be... uhhhh... really cute? You're talking about Hinata, right? Of course you are. Their kid would be cute, yeah.

**How would the bloodline thing turn out?**

Yay, more bloodline. Whoppi-doo... I suppose their kid would get that bloodline. Yeah, that would happen, it has too. That'd be cool! An Uzumaki with Byakugen.

**What do you think of the clans in Konoha?**

I dunno! They're cool? Yeah, they are cool! I want to be in a clan like that. Or maybe not!?

**Are you jealous of them?**

Apearently I don't know. Maybe, maybe not! Awsome...

**Can you say, 'Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious'?**

Yes, I just did! It's really easy, actually. You've been watching _Mary Poppins_? Great movie, really.

**Or, 'Pneumonoult...ramicro...' uhhhh...?**

Um... no...! I can't say that, it was really hard."

_He tries to say it a couple of times and force the other boys to try, but none of them can._

"Okay, let's keep on.

**ØWhat if in the future Akatsuki killed a friend of Naruto because he was a container of Shukaku and then tried to kidnap Naruto to get his demon out of him and have him die?**

That's gonna happen? Dude, that's not nice. I hate that bastard! I wanna kill him. What's his name? I'll kill him.

**What's your favorite jutsu?**

Hmmmm, good question. I'm not sure. I really like the Rasengan, but... I'm not surrrreeee... I don't know, the Rasengan I think."

_He looks at the next questions._

"No, Obito's on a mission... Kakashi too... Orochimaru isn't here, but sure, we'll answer them... Anko is also on a mission... Oh, let's have those for Sarutobi. Oi, Sarutobi, come here!"

_The other Hokage comes in._

"Here you go!"

S: "_Hey, thanks! Let's see then..._

**_ØIs it just me, or are all the ninjas in the village weird in some kind of way, including you?_**

_I believe everybody's weird. Yes, even me! But at least I'm not as weird as that guy._"

_He points at Yondaime who's quite busy having his finger in his ear, appearently digging for something._

S: "_See what I mean?_

_**If you were to have a grandson, would you name him after Konoha?**_

_If I had a grandson I think my daughter would name him. But Konoha, that was really good! I should tell her. Maybe Konohamaru, do you like that?_

_**Did you do something weird to Jiraya to have him gain his pervertedness as his sensei?**_

_Nobody needs to do something to him, he's like that by nature. Let me tell you something about him; He has a teddy bear! He sleeps with it in his arms. Now you can all blackmail him!_

_**Can you do any cool jutsus?**_

_Well, of course, I'm a Hokage, right? I can- Oh, sorry, have to go!_"

_Sarutobi leaves._

"Finally! Okay, more questions now... You guys aren't very nice! I asked you to ask These five guys some questions, but no. Then I'll just let them answer Orochimaru's questions."

_He gives Hayate the paper._

H: "_Okay, let's see... at-shjo!_"

K: "_Eew, he sneezed all over it! I'm not touching it now!_"

H: "_Sorry, I'm sick._"

I: "_You always are._"

G: "_Okay, I'll do the first one._

_**Are you pedophile?**_

_No, I'm not- Oh, it's for Orochimaru. Then yeah, I'm pretty sure he-_"

R: "_No, he isn't, Genma! I'm quite sure of that._"

G: "_But how do we know, Raidou? How do we know?_"

K: "_And shut up! Next question._

_**Why is your village mostly made up by kids?**_

_'Cause kids totally kick ass!_"

I: "_You just say that because you're a kid yourself!_"

K: "_Yeah!_"

H: "_The next one is- at-shjo! Sorry!_

_**What happened to Kabuto?**_

_I don't even know who that is. What about you, Izumo? Kotetsu?_"

K: "_Nope!_"

I: "_Never heard of. Okay, I'll do this one._

_**How do you feel being Anko's sensei?**_

_Hey, Hayate, you're in her team. How does he feel?_"

H: "_I'm not in Anko's team._"

G: "_Really? Oh..._"

H: "_Some friends you guys are..._"

_Complete silence._

"Okay, so they're done with that. Let's keep on! Oh, from _kksmarties_. Oh, so you like it that I decided to keep on with this? Good, I did it because of my fans. Oka- oh, it's for Sarutobi... Hey, idiot, you have more questions..."

S: "_Oh, how nice._"

"I think it's evil..."

S: "_Shut up or go and sulk. Okay, so you chose sulking. Of course..._

_**Why do you do all the work if Yondaime is the Hokage?**_

_I'm Hokage too! And I do it for you, not him. You want him to answer, so I make sure that happens. You should be thankful I'm so nice to Uzumaki._"

"Great, now, get out! Ooooh, questions for me!

**What do you think about chocolate?**

Oh, I love chocolate. And I really love 'SMASH'. If you ever go to Norway, buy it! It's great. And their milk chocolate. It's called melkesjokolade. I can Norwegian, you guys proud? Sure you are!

**When everyone grow up, who do you think will be the hottest?**

Me! Okay, maybe not. And I have grown up. According to nature and jutsus, it will be Kakashi. His bloodline thing you know. But he can't show his face, that bastard. And of the girls... Iruka. What, he's acting like a girl! He screamed when he saw this spider yesterday. No, he didn't yell, he screamed. Like a girl! And Kakashi got rid of the spider for him. Ironic, eh?

**Are you sure that you can't see the future?**

A-ha! Sure! No, wait, maybe I can. Yes, I can see something now... all my fans... inviting me to... eat ramen with them... and... they go to... Norway... and buy me... chocolate... Heh, I'm just kidding, I can't see the future. Or maybe...? Nah, I can't!

**Do you think Kurenai is hot?**

What's the matter with you guys? You think I'm pedophile? She's fifteen. Come on! But if she was at my age, maybe a bit. I said if she was at MY age...

**ØWhy did you kill yourself just because there was some giant demon outside of Konoha?**

I did? You lying bastards! You told me I died as a hero!"

_He goes to a corner to sulk._

H: "_Oh-keeeei... Let's go on without him then._

_**Kill Itachi and Orochimaru!**_

_Hey, this fan wants you to-_"

"I know, I heard you. Besides, I think their both dead already."

K: "_Cool! Me now, gimme the paper._

**_ØIf you don't kill Orochimaru, at least kill Sasuke so that when he's twelve he doesn't leave Konoha and become an S-class criminal and make Naruto and Sakura sad and him become evil and destroy everything 'cause Itachi ruined his life._**

_Right... You have some quite weird fans, don't you?_"

"M-hm...!"

I: "_Don't worry, guys. He'll kill Orochimaru. If he isn't dead already..._

**_If you don't do what I said in question six, you're seriously screwed._**"

"I told you I'll DO it! Geez! Besides, you all know I'm screwed anyways. And I'll take the next questions, I'm done sulking.

**What do you think of you being paired up with Anko?**

Ewwww... gross! She's eleven, dammit! At least I think she is... Besides, I don't like her. She's so... you know!

**What would think if Naruto met this guy who's like a girl on a mission?**

I think? I mean, of course I think! Hehe... Sooooo... are you saying he'll meet Obito? I'm just kidding! I don't know really, guess it'd be okay. Hell annoying, but okay.

**What do you think of Deidara-kun?**

Screw him! Haha, that could be tolked in two ways. Eh? EH??? I'm so funny... Okay, don't screw him like that, just... you know... yeah..."

_Genma gives him a new paper._

"Ah, thanks, Genma-kun. Og course, more from _anime-girl98_, why am I not surprised.

**Why do you like yourself so much?**

'Cause I kick ass, duh! I'm like so cool!"

R: "_He thinks he's that cool._"

K: "_But he really isn't._"

I: "_Doesn't he sleep with a teddy?_"

H: "_I think it's a- cough, cough! Sorry. A frog or something._"

G: "_Because he's afraid of the dark._"

H: "_Yeah, so he isn't that great. Okay, we'll stop, you can keep on with the questions now, Yondaime-sama. Where is he?_"

_Yondaime sulks again._

I: "_Oh, brother!_"

"Fine, I'll answer.

**ØWhat do those evil villagers treat Naruto like shit after that Kyuubi inccident, even though he's not the fox, without pausing to remember that's he's your son?**

I dunno. 'Cause they're all asses? I don't know yet, because it hasn't happened yet. Remember I don't have that bloodline thing.

**Why are all the ninjas I know crazy or weird?**

I dunno... Hey, this is so deja vu like. Someone asked Sarutobi this. And you have this bloodline thing? Shame on you! But I don't know. We just are.

**What did Jiraya do to Kakashi to make him a pervert?**

He gave him... books... His books, and they're perverted, they really are."

_Kotetsu gives him a new paper._

"Thanks! Hey, from a new reviewer! _Gwinty13 _is the name. Cool! Hey, it's for Hayate."

H: "_Um, okay, thanks._

_**You always look tired, is this because you and Yugao are busy all night?**_

_Uh... no! I don't even know her. She's mean to me. I don't like her! Besides, she doesn't want to touch me, 'cause I'm sick. I look tired because I don't sleep much. I'm sick all the time, so I usually can't sleep. It sucks!_"

I: "_Right... Hey, a question for me!_

_**Your right eye is always covered by your hair, why?**_

_It looks great! I mean, really, look! It's awsome._"

K: "_I think there's something wrong with it._"

I: "_It isn't! It's just cool! And you think there's something wrong with me? You're the one with weird stuff in your face. You also have that thing over your nose._"

K: "_Oh yeah?_"

_Kotetsu and Izumo fights._

"M-hmmmm... Bye, Kotetsu! Bye, Izumo! Okay, let's keep this on. Ah, from _hannibal221_.

**ØWould you consider arranging a marrage between Naruto and Hinata?**

They're just kids and, accoriding to evil fans, I'll be dead when they grow up. Nah, I think I'll survive. Sure, if I survive and they want to I can. Promise! And I'll arrange a marrage between Kakashi and Iruka too. I don't care whenever they want to, I'll make them. Or else I'll pull down their pants, shove my foot up there twice, then a kunai, and then my foot again. Then I'll tie them up, throw them off a bridge, then rescue them and sing '_Mary had a Little Lamb_' with a really crappy voice. And that'd be it. Okay, I won't do it! They want to get married anyways."

_He puts away the papers._

"Okay, that's it. Awwww, look at Hayate, Genma and Raidou, they're sleeping. How cute!"

_He picks up Genma's hand and places it around Raidou._

"Hehe! I'm such a genious. Okay, bye!"

_The camera is turned off._


	12. Chapter 12

_Yondaime turns the camera on._

"So we're back with '_Here With Yondaime_', etcetera, etcetera. I've noticed this isn't very popular anymore. I get like four reviews every time. That's not so many. Of course, I do realize it takes me longer to answer, but I'm doing the best I can. But even this has to come to an end! I'm sorry to say, to all of you who wants me to continue, that I will quit after the next time. I mean it this time."

_He wipes away a tear._

"That means I've got to start doing paperwork... poor me... Well, let's not sulk so much anymore. Oh yeah, you guys do remember the awsome bloodline thing there's been a lot of talk about? Maybe I do have! When I sleep, I dream about these weird things and some of the things happen. Or maybe I'm just crazy... Nah, I think I have that bloodline thingy! 'Cause I rock!"

_He laughs with a maniacly laughter._

"No, I do not know why I did that! It just had to happen sometime, eh? Oh yeah, speaking of my weird dreams; I dreamed that Kakashi and Iruka would make a show like this when they grow up. Cool? Oh yeah! But shall we start?"

_He picks up one of the few papers._

"This is from _Emperor Jaden_. Aww, it's so nice to know I still have some fans... Hmm, Ramen Defender, eh? Not so bad. You have brains enough to become a ninja. Then again, who hasn't, it's not that hard.

**How did you think of the Hirashin and the Rasengan?**

Well, I didn't really think of it! I mean, you know how all the geniuses in the world invent stuff by accidents? Yeah, that's what I did. It was accidents all the way.

**Did it take a while to invent them?**

To make them perfect, yes. That took hell of a time!

**Naruto and Hinata would be really cute together as a couple, don't you think?**

Yes, yes, I've got it! You reviewers want them to end up together. Use your bloodline thing and see if they do end up together then.

**Who would you like Naruto to go out with; Sakura, Ino, Hinata or Anko?**

Ewwww, Anko! I don't like her! Besides, she's way older than my son. I'd say Hinata, or else I'd probably be scold by you fans."

_He stretches and mutters things about 'so many questions'._

"Okay, you give me more ramen! Sweet! Thanks, dude, I love ramen. Um, you have a question for Itachi!? He's not… exactly avalible… right now… I'm not even sure if he's alive. Hehe…! But I can answer it! Or maybe Sarutobi? Hey, Sarutoooobiiii!!!"

_Sarutobi comes into the room._

"Answer this!"

_Yondaime gives him the paper._

S: "_For Itachi? Um, okay…?_

**_If you ever think about killing your best friend, and your entire clan, leaving only Sasuke alive so that he can grow up hating you, don't! If you do, the worlds supply of pocky, ramen, meat, and other good stuff will be destroyed, and you'll have to eat food that no matter how much you exercise, you'll become super-fat, and become the worst ninja ever, and be raped in your sleep by eight other men, every day!_**

_Uhhhh… I didn't see a question here…_"

"Huh! I think it's meant for you though. I'm kidding, kidding, just kiddiiiing!!! Okay, but at least we got it clear that Itachi should NOT kill his clan."

_He tells Sarutobi to leave and picks up a new paper._

"Hey, I've got more from _isrocks_. What's it this time?

**If I give you ramen, would you bring Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto to the show?**

Actually, I had already planned that. Next time, the last time that is. But I'd like the free ramen!?"

_He picks up yet a new paper._

"From _kksmarties_ again. Sweeeet…

**Do you hate Deidara-kun because he's from Iwa?**

Who's Deidara? No, really! I'm not kidding this time! Who is he? Oh well…

**Kill anyone who claims they're from Oto!**

And on with the demands. Fine, I'll kill them! Geez!

**Tell Asuma-**

Augh, geez! This isn't a question. But I'll tell him not to get killed. Better yet, I won't send him on that mission."

_He picks up the last paper._

"Okay, this is the last paper. I hope to get more the last bloody time. And this is from _Gwinty13_.

**Are Tsunade and Jiraya a couple or something?**

Yes, they're a couple. Ops! That was a secret. But I didn't tell you, right? No, Sarutobi did, yeah! But they are, really.

**Do you think Asuma and Kurenai would be a cute couple?**

Oh, yeah! They are together in fact. Cool, eh?"

_He puts away the papers and walk over to the camera._

"Okay, that's it! Please, lot's of questions now. Bye!"

_The camera is turned off._


	13. Chapter 13

**Here With Yondaime**

**By: **DracoAries.

**Written: **9th of March, 2007.

**Disclaimer: **All 'NARUTO' characters (c) Masashi Kishimoto.

**Inspired by: **My friend _Scarlet Butterfly_ and other fan fictions.

**Reason: **She loves him an awful lot. There are so many fan fictions with ask this-and-this-person, but not with Yondaime.

**Summary:**

We have all read ask _NARUTO_ characters fan fictions. But this time it's with Yondaime.

**Chapter 13:**

_The camera is turned on in Yondaime's office for the last time._

"Eh-hem! Okay, so welcome to the last show of '_Here With Yondaime_'. First I have to thank you all for reading and reviewing. It's been hell of a lot fun, it really has. Oh, and I have some special thanks at the end. And I never thought I would get this many questions now, dude! Quite creepy, you know… But we should just get started then, eh?"

_He picks up a paper from the large pile._

"First we have from a good and dear friend of the owner here, _Sasuke1991_.

**What happens if you mix up two bloodlines, like, I don't know, Byakugen and Sharingan?**

Of COURSE you had to ask THAT! You and _DracoAries _have talked about this for a long time, haven't you? And since the two of you are totally idiots, you wanted me to answer… Well, the truth is; … I have no idea… Maybe he/she would get both? Pretty cool…

**What do you think about Kakashi and Iruka having a baby?**

Um… ewwww…? You really have to stop talking to _DracoAries_! Or maybe not… She's weird, I know! But, um, I think it's… ewwww! Really ewwww!!!"

_He gets chills._

"But anyway, _Sasuke1991_, have a good trip to Finland! Hope you get time to read this before you leave, but I doubt it. Have a nice trip anyways!"

_He picks up a new paper._

"Ooooh, from _Flame Rising_. You're new, aren't you? Oh well… Um… I think these questions are for the owner, _DracoAries_. Oi, get in here, will you."

_For the first time ever _DracoAries _is at the show, which means her name won't be in italics right now._

D.A.: "Cool! Okay, let's see then… Mhm, first an insult… then…

**How old are you; five, six?**

Mhm…! Okay, fuck you! That insult was quite childish, even though I have quite childish insults myself, won't blame you for that. But I'd like to read whatever the fucking piece of shit from your ass could write. And to answer your freaking question; I'm fifteen, soon sixteen!

**What the fuck is wrong with you that you think you can write a story people want to read?**

Well, I HAVE gotten many reviews, haven't I? So to be honest, I think it's something fucking wrong with YOU! You ask what's wrong with me, thinking someone would read this. I didn't except many to do so, but they did and I'm grateful. You also just had to ask me these questions so that I would have to answer them, because that's what I do in this story. Now those who DO like it have to read you fucking stupid arguments, you piece of shit!"

_She takes a break._

D.A.: "And you say those who read this are just as much losers as I am!? Well, you, nor I, know all of them, so how can we ever find out? Oh, and you've read it too, haven't you? So screw you right up your fucking sorry ass!"

_She gets quite pissed now and NOW she starts being a total ass._

D.A.: "Never write again, eh? Why not? I haven't planned on writing something like this again, you scum! And have you even read anything else I've written? I guess you haven't, so how can you say this, you asshole? And jump off a cliff? Sure, I could do that. But you know what? Unlike you, who waste your sorry ass-time flaming others, making them feel a bit miserable, I have a life. In that life, I have friends, _Sasuke1991 _and _ScarletButterfly91_, and I know they'd jump after me, to save the life I have."

_She's very pissed now._

D.A.: "And your final question.

**Got it?**

Huh? You said something? Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you just were that bastard I shove my foot up the ass, then a kunai, then my foot again. After that I believe I tied that worthless piece of dog crap up, threw him/her off a bridge, got him/her up again and sang '_Mary had a Little Lamb_' in a really crappy voice. Oh, so that WAS you!? Cool, I fucking hate you, you STINKING SOUND OF A CRAP-EATING, FOUL, SHIT-LIKE, ASS-WIPING BITCH!!!"

_She leaves._

"Um, right! You know, I agree. That was harsh, dude! She hasn't done anything, has she? Except writing a story you just had to flame. So if you actually read this, I hope you rot in peace together with your worthless, and hurting, flames. When your time comes that is, I don't need you to die yet. Notice I said need, not want! And my beloved fans? Don't pay any attention to this. It's just pathetic that someone does this."

_Yondaime picks up a new paper._

"Well, you still have the heart to laugh I hope!? Or else I believe _DracoAries _would be sad… So I hope you laugh at the answers to the questions from _Emperor Jaden_.

**You really think I could be a ninja?**

Why, of course! All you guys could. Some of you could even be specialists at torture. You torture me with your questions sometimes. SOMETIMES!

**Can I train in Konoha?**

Sure, I wouldn't mind. Please do, all of you who wants to."

_He stretches a bit._

"Oh, right, I promised you guys to bring Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke today. Well, I won't! I'll summon them from the future instead! I read the reviews and some have questions for them, so… Okay, let's go!"

_He does a jutsu and 'POOF', here they are._

"Okay, there are some questions for you, Naruto."

N: "_Dude, what happened? Just now we were on a mission with Kakashi-sensei. What are we doing here?_"

SU: "_How should I know, dobe? Looks like Godaime-sama's office._"

SH: "_I think we're in the past. Hey, look, Naruto! Your father!_"

"Hey, I come in peace. I mean, you come in peace, you! 'Cause I'm already here. Or do you come in peace? Maybe you don't! Please, DON'T kill me! I'm way too sexy…"

SU: "_Hm, that's his father all right…_"

N: "_Who cares? He told me I had questions. From FANS! Gimme that! Thanks._

_**What's it like to have the greatest Hokage ever as your dad?**_

_"I do?_"

SH: "_Yes, Yondaime-sama, remember?_"

N: "_Oooohhhh… Cool! Yeah, I like that, but I'm gonna be better. 'Cause I'm totally cool! Okay, more questions, yes… Hey, I got ramen!?_"

"Yeah, that happens quite often."

N: "_Awwwwsommmme! Okay, thanks!_

_**What's your favourite colour?**_

_Orange. That's my favourite fruit too. It's so sweeeet… Um, right…_

_**Do you like Hinata?**_

_Yeah, she's awesome! And pretty… I'm taking her out for ramen next week. I'm so totally nice._"

"Mhm… Okay, these are for you, Sakura."

SH: "_Thank you, Yondaime-sama! Okay, let's see…_

_**How's Ino?**_

_Oh, she's fine, in fact- Oh, you mean like… in a friend way? Well, we're quite good friends now actually. We stopped fighting about Sasuke-kun. I won! He's MINE! Ino has another boy though. Guess who!? Choji! They're actually a cute couple... Oh, you… you like my forehead? Why thank you so much! And I'm cute? I know!_"

"And the rest is for Sasuke."

SU: "_Hm!_

_**What do you think of Itachi?**_

_He's dead, nothing to think of._"

N: "_I thought he was in rehab?_"

SU: "_……… oh yeah…_

**_If Itachi killed your entire clan, and his best friend, told you that the only way to defeat him was to grow up hating him, and gaining the Mengykyuo Sharingan was the only way to defeat him, which would eventually lead to you having -billions- of fan-girls that will -never- leave you alone, which would eventually lead to a pale faced, snake-like man biting you, and taking over your brain, but you gets lots of power, at the cost of everyone in the village hating you, but your fan-girls, and the life of one of your best friends, and being molested by said pale faced, snake-like man every single night, and your only other option was to stay best friends with Naruto and Sakura, which will get you the you even more power, but it will take longer, what would you do?_**

_Ummmm… what?_"

"Fans! They're crazy!"

SU: "_Hm! Well, I don't know. I mean, I… don't… quite know yet. We'll see._"

"Okay, and now; more questions for ME! Yay…"

_He picks up a new paper._

"From a new one again. A flamer? Oh good, it isn't! It's _RavenMasterShinobi_. Digg name!

**Does Naruto have a sister or a brother?**

Nope! Not that I know about… hehe… Hi, Naruto… eh-hem, yes… right."

_He picks up a new paper._

"Hey, more from _isrocks_. Great! Oh, it's for you three… No, I'LL read it!

**Would you three do a threesome your frist time, then would you three be a couple?**

Okay…?"

SH: "_What does frist mean?_"

N: "_Maybe ice cream?_"

SH: "_Yes, that makes soooo much sense. Your ice cream time?_"

N: "_Mmmm… ice cream…_"

SU: "_I don't know either, but… maybe he or she is asking us three… to… be a couple?_"

SH: "_Not possible! First off; you can't be three in a couple. I think…? And second; ME with NARUTO? Please, I have enough with you._"

SU: "_I'm… flattered…_"

"So… we don't understand the question? No? Okay, sorry, dude, but we're confused. Not a big surprise, eh?"

_He picks up a new paper._

"From _kksmarties _again. Nice!

**What are you like when you're in a happy-go-lucky mood?**

Um… normal? Like now I suppose. I'm always happy!

**If Orochimaru is dead, then who's Anko's sensei?**

I dunno. Just wait! SARUTOBIIII!!!"

_The older man comes in._

"Who's Anko's sensei?"

_Sarutobi tells him._

"Oh, okay. It's Orochimaru. Or maybe a clone! 'Cause I'm sure I did…

**What kind of TV do you watch?**

SONY. What? Oh, you mean shows. Of course, I knew that… hehe… This and that, comedy mostly.

**Have you thought about inventing chocolate ramen?**

That is SUCH a great idea! Thanks, I'll invent that. And credit you of course! And that's all from that reviewer."

_He picks up yet another paper; the pile doesn't seam to be smaller at all._

"From a new one again. Always nice to see new people. The name was _The Plotter_. Cool! You plot things? Awesome…

**Will you kill my sister?**

No! You have to love your family. Except Sasuke. 'Cause his brother killed their family. Besides, he's an ass…"

SU: "_Hey!_"

"Anyways…

**Will you eat this two-ton ramen?**

For you I will. Naruto, care to help me?"

N: "_YOU BET!_"

SH: "_Yup, Naruto's father for sure…_"

"Okay, great, look! Ramen!

**Will you blow up me sister?**

Nah! I don't want to do that either.

**Why are you so awesome?**

Good question! Yes, why? You know what? If I was about to give you all the reasons, it would be far too much to read. So I'll just say I'm awesome because I am!

**Are you dating?**

Nope! I'm totally not. I go to strip clubs though and- I mean… uhhhh… Yes, let's just say… yes…

**How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?**

I have had that question before. So please just go back and see.

**How tall are you?**

I don't know. Hey, Sakura, help me out here."

_Sakura helps him measuring himself._

"Thanks! Let's see… I'm 1.77. I'm THAT short? You're kidding! Damn…

**Are you bi-shounen?**

Huh? What's that? Like… just bi? Then no, I'm not. Don't have anything against gay people though. And that was it?"

SU: "_Nope, one more._"

_Sasuke gives him the last paper._

"Thanks, Sasuke. From _Gwinty13_. Digg!

**What is Tenten's last name?**

I don't know. Do you guys know?"

_Sakura and Sasuke shrug._

N: "_Oh, I know, I know! It's Tonton! Got it? Tenten Tonton? Eh?_"

"That was pathetic! Poor Tsunade's pig. I mean, poor Tenten… yeah…

**How old is Gai Maito really?**

He's at Kakashi's age. Well, he's a bit older; he's born the 1st of January. Kakashi's born the 15th of September.

**Did you think you would look good in a green spandex?**

I look good in everything! No, really, I do! But hell if I would wear one. Ewwww…

**Is it possible that Naruto's mother has a bloodline?**

Could be possible, yes. Good theory!"

N: "_Heeeey! Who is my mother._"

"I dunno! But I believe that's all the questions. And I said I had some special thanks here. So let's start then."

_Yondaime brings out a paper from his pocket._

"First to _ScarletButterfly91_; she was the inspiration to the whole thing here. And then it's _Sasuke1991_; she and _DracoAries_ has made up a lot of ideas to this. You guys are the best!"

_He takes a little break while flipping the page; he didn't write much on each side._

"I would like to thank these reviewers:

**yondaime-kun**

**Gwinty13**

**isrocks**

**Emperor Jaden**

**anime-girl98**

You guys have given me a hell of a lot to do, but it was fun. Thanks!"

_Silence._

"Oh yeah! Today all those who have been on the show to have a party."

_In comes all those who have._

"And all you reviewers, except the one with the flame and the one who reported me, are welcome to join. We're in… Konoha…! Well, duh, how thick can I get? So if you wanna meet Sarutobi,Kakashi, Iruka, Hayate, Genma, Izumo, Kotetsu, Raidou, Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke and me, welcome! Aaaand… PARTY!!!"

_This time the camera isn't turned off, but knocked over, so it broke._

_So Yondaime can't keep on without a camera._

_Unless he buys a new one._

_But he won't…_

…

_oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo_

I really hope you liked this. I have used so many hours and days on it. But it was worth it, so thank you all. Of course I would be happy to get more reviews, but I won't answer more now.

I decided to stop at thirteen chapters because, you know, it's 13. Brings me good luck. And Yondaime's heigh is 1.77 because I think 77 would fit quite well to him. He is a saviour after all…

Most of these answers are fan made. Some aren't, like Gai's birthday. Most of the answers to Yondaime's personality are based on me. I am a fan, and not in contact with anything official that has to do with 'NARTUO'.

And if you're interested, I'm going to write a fanfic with Kakashi and Iruka holding a talkshow. They will have people there, talking about so called serious issues and having funny flashbacks.

Thank you yet again!

Improve the Perfect!


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